Self-Giving, Loving God: Living in a Context of Self-Giving Love

We love because he first loved us.

I John 4:19

There have been innumerable attempts to give a clear and concise understanding of the “many splendored thing” we call love. We use the word love frequently in our lives. We say we love our spouse, our children, and even God. But we also say we love our pets, pizza, Lady Gaga, or our favorite sports team. Obviously, the word love doesn’t always mean the same thing.

Dallas Willard defines love as "the will-to-good for another," emphasizing a deliberate choice to seek what is beneficial for the beloved, rather than simply fulfilling their desires or experiencing positive feelings. He distinguishes love from mere desire, highlighting that love is a commitment to the well-being of another, even if it means acting against their immediate desires. 

I believe that love is the most powerful force of energy in the universe. Greater than the forces of hate or separation, betrayal, abandonment, indifference, or willful selfishness.  

Throughout the life of Jesus, at least two principles emerged regarding love:

The first is that love is manifested in deeds, not just in words. God's love, poured into your heart, will move you toward your sisters and brothers. Jesus demonstrated this value through the vehicle of the Incarnation. God became like us as a pouring out of love for humanity. Jesus’s whole life was one of listening to people’s deepest longings and needs, healing, suffering, and identifying with all aspects of humanity. St. Francis of Assisi recognized this when he said, “Preach the Gospel at all times, use words if necessary.”

The second principle is that love consists of a mutual sharing between two people; the one gives to and shares with the other all that the one has, and the other acts towards the one in the same way. Jesus’s entire life was a life of self-giving, even unto the point of death on a cross. Jesus gave forth all that he was and all that he had. The only adequate response to such an abundant, extravagant, and undeserved gift is to do the same.

Contemplating the self-giving love of God is a worthy and transformative spiritual practice. You will find much to stretch your mind and your soul as you come face to face with the self-giving love of God. Thomas Merton defined contemplation as spiritual wonder: “It is spontaneous awe at the sacredness of life, of being. It is gratitude for life, for awareness, and for being. It is a vivid realization of the fact that life and being in us proceed from an invisible, transcendent, and infinitely abundant Source. Contemplation is, above all, awareness of the reality of that Source.” The self-giving love of God is indeed vivid and awe-inspiring.

In St. Ignatius’ Spiritual Exercises, the final contemplation, or prayer experience, is the Contemplation of Divine Love. It is also referred to as the Contemplation of the Love of God or, my personal favorite and self-proclaimed title, Contemplation on the Self-Giving, Loving God. This prayer experience is the culmination of the weeks of prayer that precede it. In this contemplation, we draw on our experience of God’s overwhelming love encountered in the Exercises to empower our lives moving forward. From this vantage point, we begin to see that the whole movement of the Spiritual Exercises has been rooted and oriented toward love.

German poet Rainer Maria Rilke captures the movement of the entire Exercises as well as this specific contemplation perfectly: “We are cradled close in your hands – and lavishly flung forth.” The call to “come and see” invited forth from the lips of Jesus in John 1:39 has reached a critical juncture. Now we are invited to take the love and grace that God has so generously given us during our time in the Spiritual Exercises and incarnate it in our own lives.?

A contemplation practice:

Consider my friends, and call to mind all the gifts you have received throughout your life. Ponder the creative and redeeming activity of God in your life. Recall with deep feelings how much God has shared God’s own riches with you, and indeed has shared God’s very self with you. Look at the entire sweep of God’s loving dealings with you.

How do you want to respond to God’s self-giving 
love in your life?

When you have caught your breath from the wonder and awe just experienced, consider God’s presence incarnationally in your life. Each person who comes into your life is, to a greater or lesser extent, a source of the Risen Christ walking beside you on the road to Emmaus if you can but recognize Him. Everything good that happens to you is a sacrament revealing God keeping God’s promise: "Do not be afraid, for I am with you.” God does not just give you gifts; God comes personally with and in these gifts. Living in your heart, literally, God is transforming you into an increasingly faithful image of God’s self. You can find God in all things; the visible world is permeated with the invisible. God is in creation as you are in your body. Consider how God dwells in creation: in the elements, giving them existence; in the plants, giving them life; in the animals, giving them sensations; in human beings, giving them intelligence. Finally, consider how, in this way, God dwells also in you, giving you existence, life, sensation, and intelligence; and even further, making you a temple, since you are created as a likeness and image of the Divine Majesty.

How do you want to respond to this God who 
gives and gives of God’s self and love in your life?

Now, ponder the way God is constantly and continually laboring for you. Look at your life and ask for the faith to discern the hand of God leading your path to fulfillment and maturity in Christ.  Identify the peak moments when you realize the experiences that were clearly the Lord at work in your life. Do not forget to contemplate God intervening very personally in the course of creation by emptying God’s self and becoming a part of that creation in Jesus, God’s Son. Be invited, dear friend, to look at some of the more painful and seemingly negative experiences of your life. You may be able to see how God has brought you through experiences of your own and others' failures or sinfulness. Also consider any need for healing of memories that may surface.

How do you want to respond to this aspect of God’s self-giving love in your life?

Now, move from knowledge of God as Giver of every gift, as being in every gift, as laboring to develop every gift, to a focus on God’s very Self. See everything good in creation—kindness, love, compassion, tenderness, understanding, forgiveness, and sensitivity. See everything that is beautiful in sight and sound, harmony and peace, everything that is attractive in people and the creation, as all being Words of God, revealing who and what God is, the source of all goodness and grace. Praise the Giver.

What would it look like for you to live your life openly 
within the context of the Self-Giving God who 
lavishes gift after gift upon you?

Two possible responses:

A prayer:

Take, Lord, and receive all my liberty, my memory, my understanding, and my entire will.

All I have and call my own, You have given all to me. 

To you, Lord, I return it. 

Everything is yours; do with it what you will. 

Give me only your love and your grace, that is enough for me. 

-St. Ignatius of Loyola

A Song:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Em3hX4FQVAM&list=OLAK5uy_lkC-JY505QaxtWLO_fJzCxgkRr45cHaqQ&index=14